Monday, June 20, 2016

My Progression of Emotions Towards Running

Oh, so many emotions towards running. The funny thing is they change weekly.  So, I thought I'd elaborate and share with you the roller coaster of feelings these past 9 weeks.

To start, I decided to start running 10 weeks ago.  After hernia surgery in December, and quitting my gym membership (mom guilt), I had no exercise outlet.  So, I laced up my shoes and started running (let's be real, a jog).  I have no goal in mind.  I don't own a scale, so the only weigh-in I do is my yearly check-ups.  I have no desire to do a 5K, 10K, or half-marathon.  A reason I did start running was to maintain or even lose a little weight, and this is told by how my clothes fit and how I feel.  Let's get started:

Week 1:  Thoughts running through my head:  "I think I'm dying."  "Why would anyone do this for fun?"  How long do I have to be gone for Greg to come looking for me?"  "I'm pretty sure my  6 year old can run faster than me."  "I'm still dying."

Week represented through emojis:
Week 2:  Mallory joined me for the next few weeks.  I had to listen to her sweet voice tell me that she is faster than me and ask why I go so slow.  It was actually good bonding time, when I could breathe.  Thoughts:  "I might not be dying, but I still don't enjoy this."  "I still feel silly."

Week represented through emojis:
Weeks 3 & 4:  These weeks were where I wanted to quit.  I was running past some kids and thought they said something mean.  My feelings were hurt by a 12 year old.  That was pretty depressing, but Greg reminded me that I blow things out of proportion (only a few times) and it was probably all in my head.  So, I gave myself a pep-talk and kept going.  Thoughts:  "Middle schoolers are stupid."  "I can do this."  "I am officially not dying!!"

Week represented through emojis:

Week 5:  This week I started a longer run with a friend.  It was great conversation time, as well as an accountability person.  Thoughts:  " It's sort of nice to run with a friend."  "I might be enjoying running a teensy-weensy bit."  

Week represented through emojis:  
P.S.  We don't dress like this to run, but friend emojis are slim-pickings.

Weeks 6-7:  My goal at the beginning was to run atleast 2 times a week.  I am doing 3.  I am motivated to accomplish this number. I added more distance and am changing up my routes (I get bored very easily with exercising).  I have started timing my miles...which I will not be sharing because it is so sad.  Thoughts:  "Feeling stronger."  "I got this!"

Week represented through emojis:
Week 8:  VBS Week. Those two words should explain everything. It was a very LONG week. Only did one long run, and only one thought:  "So. Much. Sweat."  Welcome Summer, you are extremely hot!

Week represented through emojis:

Week 9:  I just finished my run and met two goals.  One:  I ran the WHOLE time!  Now, some of that running might have been very slow, but it still counted.  Two:  I met a time goal for my mile.  Was pretty happy since I went a little earlier than usual and could barely breathe, it was so hot and humid.  Thoughts:  "Getting faster!"  "Faster than my 6 year old!"  "Hard to breathe, but still doing it!"  "Just one more minute."

Week represented through emojis:  
Sort of looks like me, don't you think?? Except the smile, I am never smiling when running.  Haha.

So, there it is in a nutshell.  I will be finishing Week 9 on the beach.  I've never run on the sand, but we shall see.  

In the wise words of Dory, "Just keep swimming." ...but running in this case.  

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